I am alive and well, and thanks for waiting. You probably guessed that I put the whole project aside for a good long while -- eight or so months. I spent a good portion of that wondering why, but I knew that no matter the reason (fear, it's always fear), it would be better for the break. Honestly, I was just so overwhelmed by the size and shape of this thing. It was too big to see clearly and I was sick of the sound of my own voice. That hasn't changed, really, but it's a new year and all that. Time to get this thing out of dry dock.
I have finally gone through the edit in its entirety, a difficult and sometimes painful process. I was grateful, if chagrined, about the grammar and punctuation stuff, but the larger questions were onerous. What do I mean here? How does this tie in with this other, seemingly contradictory statement? And so on. But also, this sort of thing can't help but be a compendium of your difficulties and failures, a retrospective of all the hard knocks. It's a lot to swim in every day.
But swim I have! I am very near the end. And as much as I would love to put not only this book but that chapter of my life behind me, we drag a lot of baggage around. You are never really talking entirely about the past. The good news is that I realized something new about myself. I am always happy to do that but this one is Big. It explains a lot, in fact, about so much of my history. And I don't mean to tease, but I think I need to let it percolate. You might need to buy the book. :)
That's mostly a joke. I'm not sure how to get to the next step from here, so a book you can actually access still feels miles away. But for now, I need to look at the order of things, make sure it all makes sense, add a few minor thing in here and there, and then call it done. The next hurdle is to find beta readers to make sure this makes sense. That presents its own set of challenges but it can't be harder than writing it, it just can't.
Here's to getting closer.